Using Symbolism To Train The Subconscious Mind

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My Experiences With Detachment

The philosophical definition of detachment is non-attachment. The desire or ability to release control of things, concepts or people. A principle predominantly taught in Buddhism and Hinduism.

Detachment from all things that won't benefit your growth a the keystone concept that changes your life for the better. 

Early Life

I casually waltzed in and out of depression in my early teens, having this forthright view on life, that teenage 'I know it all perception'. Eventually realising that even when you think you know something, there's still more to learn. Of course, I only acknowledged most things through the perception I had and through observation of what my perception could see. Years later only to realise that you never really know the entirety of anything, the more experiences you have, of course the more it teaches you. Realising that what you believe is not predominantly the problem. It's good to believe in something but it's the way you go about it that makes it wrong or right, no matter your intentions. Try to approach everything with integrity, otherwise, you will draw the short straw. Often responding from lack of experience will have you recollecting your thoughts and wishing you had known better.

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'Why I Don't See Colour' comments & Renewed hope for the diaspora

Being a brown girl of Afro Caribbean descent in western society comes with challanges on a daily basis that simply cannot be denied. For the most part, even when I try to deny them, it presents itself again and again glaringly in different ways. Through these difficulties, like being the only brown girl in the room, class or establishment. It is clear that wherever you look across the world darker skinned people are simply not given the same opportunities, resources and at times even respect, just because of what they look like. While the Arian, lighter skinned European nations do not suffer from these issues. Due to living in a colder climate, (which my tropical nature loving body has never really gotten used to). I have developed all of my characteristics from the original woman, my body shape, my hair texture, eyes and full lips, my beauty spots and moles even down to my personality, my health all derive predominately from my sub-Saharan genetics.


Anyone that knows me and even knew me well in the past could call me different, unorthodox or even misunderstood (personality wise), but never racist. That would be deliberately undermining the very nature of who I am, my lifestyle, the way I eat and live, and my fundamental beliefs.

In 2015 my 'Colourism vs Racism' blog post was in no way shape or form, diminishing my own heritage or that of my ancestors. My lineage were also slaves and potentially slave owners, they were also aboriginal people of the land. To insidiously undermine this notion would be denying and disrespecting my blended family and the many people that raised me. Essentially attempting to erode the very essence of who I am and my ancestors.


    It takes a village to raise a child


I know that anyone that knows and even knew me well in the past would never do that, as it would be completely fraudulent claims. Although at the same time I innerstand how politically and historically the present time we live in requires us to increasingly acknowledge the repercussions that colonialism and slavery has had on our family lives, education, history and our financial resources for those who have suffered and still suffer all varieties of different prejudice and discrimination for the way that they look and I do not want these things to ever be ignored.


   It is for these reasons we are the strongest people alive and unbreakable.

In my blog post about colourism it has come to my attention that my comments in the past of 'I don't see colour' may have been misinterpreted. For that I apologise, I obviously do see colour what I meant was I do not judge others stereotypically by their looks, features or colour and I should make it clear that it is because I myself hate to be stereotypically categorised and boxed into the labels, thoughts and narratives of other people, especially by people of European descent. I am sure most people can relate we all hate being judged before people get to know us.

I must also include that in no way shape or form do I ignore the difficulties, pain and struggles of the many nations of people throughout the diaspora that have African and Afro-Caribbean heritage (including my own), even more so in the UK and, Europe and  America. In my early years, teenage years and adolescents. The trans-Atlantic slave trade, colonialism and the general white-washing of African history infuriated me the more I studied it. A very big concept in my early life was trying to innerstasnd why we are not taught about afro inventors, leaders and history, why we only celebrate european holidays and why we are so severely punished and underrepresented.

    Most of all why to this day, we 're we never paid any reparations?

I have also always been a very passionate person, especially about my views and it made me angrier and eventually quite hopeless as many people around me didn't seem to care, the way that I did at the time. I created facebook pages and social media handles designed to share as much history and raise as much awareness as I could and it gained quite a bit of momentum. Although through difficulties in my own life, being quite young and unprepared, plus distractions and frustration against prejudice and discrimination in my own life that we're still prevalent.

I remember expressing this to friends around me at the time. Although eventually, I decided for the betterment of my own health and the way I see other people, I needed to take a less militant and more mature approach to it, plus I hadn't learnt enough to really do anything more about it. Little did I know I was thinking years before my time and looking into the future.

Being 24 now and knowing myself that much better, I know that it is truly an amazing time to be alive, with the all-black cast of Black Panther and even more representation for those of African and all mixed heritage. We're being given more opportunities, promotions and a better platform publically and this is so beautiful to finally see more of. I am not only confident in more African/Afro-Caribbean ambassadors stepping up to the plate in defense of our people's needs, requirements and voices but that the burdens felt by so many will now finally be naturally addressed with time, by assertive brothers and sisters that are better educated, equipped and suited to create a debate and discussion raising greater awareness about what really matters. The issues that our people face and what can be done about it. Working to make a change in this system without becoming part of it.

I will naturally gravitate to these efforts because it will be difficult, but it is and has always been close to my heart. Although I know now that my path and my purpose is different and that's just through knowing myself better, the struggles I have been through, my life circumstances and knowing my limitations.

My Path In Life

I have a natural interest in world history which can be translated as African or original history of the original humans. World theology translated as original African spirituality. Our ancestors knew things like science, mathematics, literature, metaphysics, herbal medicine, astrology and cosmology some being under different names. Holistic lifestyle translated as the way we originally lived as people eating and living naturally and sustainably. I am naturally passionate about embodying traditional and historical knowledge and ways of life with 21st-century living knowing that we are all taking part and shaping the future as we know it. This is my part and this is why it's a beautiful and dynamic time to be alive.

Be Happy

Be Healthy

Be Unified

Be You!

Thankyou for reading and thank you for your continued love and support!

It really makes a difference, please feel free to message me in the contact form with any feedback and more ideas for posts to write about and address.

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Desert Saxaphone

the desert heat in cool dry weathers
where the kindest of light is just a feather
let us turn these in the days we remain
the saxophone sings for the days we reclaimed
the wind whistles yearning twirling for you
of all the things most of all wish we could do
to turn the world upside down and shake it through
and let only beauty make its abide in you
and me too
01/18

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Dear Nubian Woman...

This is a letter to all Nubian women,
My Afro-Asiatic Women,
My Bantu Women,
To the African & Caribbean Diaspora, Residing Worldwide

We are all systematically underappreciated, undervalued and underrepresented. When I reflect on my past mistakes and my own self hatred I notice one thing in common. Why we do not value our Nubian mothers, teachers and queens enough. Why is it I have not celebrated the Nubian queens that we're in my life, the same way I celebrated the ones I read about in books at exactly the same time, why is it that when I look at my past mistakes, there's a continuing reoccurrence. Not all heroes wear capes, I have not appreciated all the beautiful Nubian queens in my life, I have sometimes judged them, sometimes complained about them and even at times said hateful things about them in vain, when I was unhappy and when I look to the root of it.

I can't explain why, except that I think a lot of us do

I valued things that weren't even there, but complained about what already was. The women that we're loving, praising and respecting me, uplifting and silently educating me without me noticing. Why is it I can only look back years later and really innerstand how even I didn't appreciate the Nubian queens in life, where I thought that just because they weren't saying or doing the things I wanted or expected that somehow what they we're already doing was not enough.

When I look back at some of my harshest words they we're directed at Nubian women, Melanated women. Women that loved me, praised me and we're doing there best to help me. Where did I learn that? Would I have treated other women like that? Why is it that in older age, I can see how subtle, caring and wise those diamonds we're to me regardless what teacher; mother, wife or treasure they have all been shining lights in my life. That taught me life lessons in parables, I only understand now and that truly is the power of the African woman. The most high created everything on the planet with the very same curves you find on a brown woman. True natural beauty. Brown women are truly made of the universe, in turn are versed with every lesson you need to hear when the time is right. We work very closely in Yahweh's way, tis why the darker the berry, really is the sweeter the juice. Nubian women teach universal laws, traditions you cannot learn from books. I'm so glad I never took that for granted.

With black only representing the unlimited depths of this universe we live in, with black representing the fullness, uncanny beauty and hope of our history, the kindness of our words elders words, with black only demonstrating all the great civilisations that came before us, with black representing the wisest sage, priestess and abundant creation that we would cease to exist without, with black meaning full of colour, richness, spice and curvaceous beauty, in that case, there is really nothing like the beauty and origins of what we call a black woman. (I prefer calling us brown but hey) 

Hazels have always been beautiful to me...

To all the Nubian teachers, mentors, mothers, aunties and sisters I have ever unappreciated, disrespected, complained about and not acknowledged truthfully, in the past out of pain.  I am truly sorry, coming from someone like me that is a disaster in itself because I really believe we are made in the image of the highest good. Systematic self-hatred will have you researching your history but disrespecting the history standing right in front you, dealing with you, giving you lifts home and somehow forgetting that because you've been hurt, just as society dictates.

Nubian woman, of the darkest glowing opal skin, the tightest curls, coils and spirals, to the yellow gold flowing metallic curls and spirals, our hair stands up against this worldly state. Most women desire your full lips and wide hips more then even you do. You are not represented or appreciated, half the way you should be in the media because you are one of the most beautiful living creatures on earth.

we need our women, life simply doesn't continue on without you.

Forgive me, my old friend, 'she's ugly, she's pretty for a....' Self-hatred of that kind is the most obvious cry for help, I have always loved my Nubian queens, but I see clearly now how society doesn't. African queens should be praised universally and unconditionally and we're simply not taught to even think about doing that.

So whenever idiots (I have been one of them at times) have attributed your value to your looks, you are not determined by other people's lack of the ability to appreciate you. If so it was and truly has been their loss.

It has only taught me to love all my brown mothers, sisters, teachers, aunty's and queens better.

Some of the most beautiful women I have ever perceived are women just like you,

Thank you for giving me good memories,

I am sorry, for anything I said or did because I was hurting,

I was wrong and you are truly appreciated.

Thanks for reading,

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How To Do Something You Love For A Living

When I think back on my life, I wonder how it was so hard to just decide to do what I wanted instead of doing what everyone else insisted I do. I was sickly, overweight, pale and depressed before I finally decided that enough was enough. I was willing to go to extreme length to keep my family happy and to keep up appearances. I was willing to do courses I hated and work doing something for the rest of my life just because my everyone around me said I should do it.

I often imagined what would become of me, if I didn't get sick, tired and depressed. Something inside me continued fighting even when I had given up. I trusted myself and I turnedmy whole life upside down so that it was the right way up.

Don't do something you know you don't like, you should never do that anyway. You wouldn't eat food you didn't like every day or wear clothes you hated. So why are you working somewhere you can't stand, or pretending to enjoy a course you signed up for because it will pay well in the future. Why not use all the money you have and invest in your own skills? Why not believe in your own capabilities? Instead of societies assumptions of what success actually means? One thing I can be sure that we all face is that we all need money. That's a fact. You can survive without it, but you can live with just enough of it.

You all have a minimum budget that you live on at the moment. Maybe it's just making sure you have enough to cover all the bills and debt payments. The little you have left over is for food and travel. Or maybe you have more than that, but let's start with the bare minimum. Whatever that number is, think about ways you can make it in the same amount of time or less. It has to be working for yourself, yes it's not as reliable and it may not start off well, but it is all about you. You depend on yourself and your natural instincts tell you every single day you wake up for work, that you need the money. Imagine if you persevered and was able to get that money yourself, aren't you a worthy investment.

Everyone can be an entrepreneur if they started with what they have. You don't even have to work for yourself, 9 times out 10 your dream job is not your passion and if there is a dream job let it be your passion. Even if your not yet qualified for it, or you believe it won't pay enough. All that doesn't matter, I promise you getting up every day and enjoying your life is astounding. You will enjoy every day because you are in control and your actually doing something you enjoy. Everyday!

BE YOUR BRAND

Being your brand is liberating. It gives you a sense of clarity and position. You always know your path of progression and you really feel like you can never fail because you and your business are not separate entities but in fact they are you. Naturally, you never want to be a failure so you work hard and never give up on whatever you do. You are your business so you put aside money to invest in yourself(business) every month. Everything becomes a lot clearer and feels much less like your living your life to please or work daily for others.

There is much opportunity in this modern world. Articulate your naturals skills and abilities and apply your gifts to what your passionate about.

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Patience Is Nature's Best Kept Secret

Patience, the more you have of it the better you feel.It's so much better to go slow, steady and simple, working things around you and gradually constructing the things you want, the way you want it. How much do we take patience for granted? How do you increase the amount of patience you have for something?

ALL THE MATTERS IS BEING PATIENT WITH YOURSELF

When you loose patience with other people or things, it may not be rightful but there is no love lost. When you loose patience with yourself, you loose everything. 

Meditating for at least 10 minutes a day should help keep you more routinely focused, aware and more self-disciplined and works wonders for low patience. Writing things down, or recording the way you feel daily helps you visualise where you're going wrong and address it. 

The mind can either trap your or liberate you when you find yourself passing the blame or just having too much to deal with too often. Think about how patient you are being with yourself, can you take this task slowly, do you have to skip so many steps ahead, so fast?

If everything you do is done with good intentions, slowly but surely. You're less likely to make mistakes or retakes. Your relaxed, calm and emotionally secure,  thought out in your decisions, your mindful in your actions. You've got this!

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3 Ways To Make 2017 Your Year

2017 is the Chinese year of the rooster, which turns out to be my year. What is to come, even I don't know. But I do know that it will come in the shape of whatever it is supposed to be, just for me. It won't be behind the backs of any other people, next to, in front of, or through them. It is a journey to enlightenment that only I can take and come out on the other side with.

1. Understand where you are & be realistic about your goals
2. Plan for the future by taking one step a time
3. Get rid of what's overdue in your life:

What is overdue in 2017 for me

Structure

Having more structure in my life work/study/life balance

Attracting Better People

Stop settling for less

Being More Realistic

the deepest pain for any inventor, is being realistic about your circumstances it means that even the greatest idea may have to stay written down for awhile

Being My True Authentic Self

my main motto, always stay true to you

Not Forsaking My Morals, Decency And Integrity

speaks for itself

Not Settling For Being Lied To Or Mistreated

Stop allowing yourself to be mistreated, take yourself away from people or places who don't value you or your efforts.

This year spells financial gain for those working hard for it, it offers home truth's for people who won't accept it. What it is important to know right now is that it is not a time to be naive or unaware of things in your life. Address unwanted issues, end cyclical behaviour. 2017 is a year for the rise of the indigo's, the real children of g-d will spread their wings.

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Freeman Declaration

I-Delilah Elcaro Bey is a walking. talking, independent living spirit, NOT a person, corporation, or another type of abomination.

For the record on the record, I am no fictitious entity nor straw man I am Delilah Elcaro Bey I am aboriginal flesh and blood of the earth.

I Delilah Elcaro Bey Rebuke ALL False Assumptions Pertaining To my Natural Being. I Am A Flesh And Blood Sentient Wombman Created In The Image Of Hashem

I Delilah Bey, take ownership and mastership of the strawman "TENESHA MAY ALEXANDER", and its commerce, trust, and fictitious holdings

For the record

Delilah Bey&Associates®, Actual Naturals™, the Delilah Bey® logo and all associated logos are trademarked and owned by Delilah Elcaro Bey

I-Delilah Elcaro Bey is a true Moor and original immortal bloodline.

I would also like the record to reflect I am Delilah Bey™ Builder of Actual Naturals™ In association with TLC 13Love Community™ Private

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Originality And How To Be Authentically You

Be different, always do the opposite of what everyone else is doing. Take pride in everything you do, have no shame in yourself. Remember you are a creator, never accept everything just the way it is. Never let anyone box you in, or frown upon your creativity.

Don't think about what other people will think, they're going to judge you anyway. Always do what you want and what's right for you.

Being authentic is a gift, being able to turn nothing into something is pure alchemy. Our imagination is heaven, our imagination knows no limits or bounds. It is not confined to any space or time, it is always present at our call, but we've stopped using it. We've stopped tapping into our creativity and wonder. We have given up on our creativity. We have stopped thinking about those little things we love that truly define ourselves. We mimic and copy each other in different variations, we have changed so much that we don't even notice how similar we are becoming to each other.

Men have started dressing like women and are almost unrecognisable. We are where similar fashion, eat and drink the same things, same hairstyles, brand names, TV shows. We watch the same sports and scorn anything that's even slightly different, Don't let anyone take your authenticity away from you, it defines your very being. It's the most beautiful representation of you and whoever doesn't like it, will have to lump it!

Live In This World, But Be Not Of It

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Expectations Lead To Disappointment

Does it ever seem like whatever your thinking or feeling, is when the complete opposite happens....

The expectations you have of circumstances or people, have the potential to cripple you. 

Hope

Replace high expectations with hope. To hope is not to rely on a certain situation. To be hopeful is to set a positive frame on your scenario and allow it to transform into what it is supposed to become. Hope allows the situation to be what it is and not what your idea of it should be, just what you wish it could become. Stop creating your own ideas for circumstances or people. Plan and create for the things you can control, things that are within your arms reach. If you cannot control something let it go.

Imagine g-d created all of us for planet earth. I'm sure originally our creators didn't expect their own offspring to turn against them and pretend they don't exist. But we are still here living day to day, I am sure our creators have the power to end this all now. But they don't expect from us, they allow us to become what we are supposed to be, they flow with the current of our lives, in hope we might eventually float into the right direction.

Expectations lead to disappointments. Don't be naive or foolish, don't expect other people to do as you would do.

Hope is the answer. Learn to hope for the best not expect it. Learn to hope for people, not to expect from them.The root of hope is a positive thing and the more positive you are the more positivity you attract into your life. Expect is a neutral word, it can either succeed for you, or fail you. Unfortunately for you don't get to choose. 

Thanks for reading!

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Your Home Is An Extention Of You

my home is my palace

my home is my sanctuary

my home is my sacred place

my home is my place to relax and breathe

my home is my physical expression

my home represents me

my home represents my consciousness

my home is my outer skeleton

my home is my shelter from cold weather

I always say my home is my outer skeleton. My home is my place to shut out the rest of the world, my home is my private quarters to dress and behave any way of like! My home is my creativity it represents the beauty and all the things I would like to see around me. My home is my outer skeleton, solid, stong and reliable, it protects me from the dangers of being outside. My home looks after me, so I do the same in return.

My home gives me sanity, my home gives me sanctuary, my home gives me reassurance. When my home is untidy, my thoughts are scattered and I am not grounded. When my house is dirty and dusty my thoughts are not clear and I have no clarity. When my house is not organised, I don't remember things well, I don't use my belongings properly or remember where they are. My home is my sacred space, it is filled with my energy. I cleanse my home with sage and essential oils, I keep bad spirits away with life giving plants and salts. I decorate my home with silk, mirrors and pictures of myself. My space is an extension of me, it looks after me, so I look after my space.

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The Importance Of Detachment

Detachment has been something on my mind lately, from family, from friends, and from everything. I just recently moved to a new home after moving around for awhile. A new area, a new scene it made me really want to start again. From everything and everyone, it made me only want to buy items I need and not just get things I really want. My family are not the supportive type, in fact they're as far from the word supportive as it gets. This summer has reinforced the importance of detachment. From everyone and everything that is not, or does not add value to your life.

Lately, the universe has been showing me who and what should be in my life and vice versa. Detachment is not just from people, but also from things. We hoard and collect so much, having too much attachment to anything can be bad for your health literally. Give away those shoes you've never worn and shred all that paperwork you've been telling yourself your going to need. Every material possession you could possibly need is out there, in the shops or on the high street waiting for you. 

Having too many possessions can weigh you down, without you even knowing it. Give yourself the opportunity to start again and become the true to you.

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Why Life Shouldn't Be Complicated 'Lessons Learned'

Life is simple, honestly. There's a simple explanation to almost any question you can think of in the world. For some reason we over complicate everything, we overthink and over analyse. We don't use our intuition and inner knowing much anymore. Instead we need evidence and facts to provide and decide what we actually think, instead of just asking yourself.

I believe in the most high g-d. I believe we have creators who created us and our honourable ancestors who have lived before us. Certain things in life are inevitable, you were born here alone and you will die alone, for that reason it makes sense to me that our lives are somehow planned out. We have paths to follow, the right path which is our divine path planned out by g-d, or the wrong path planned out by evil energies or satan. I believe that g-d is fully aware that a large proportion of people are born do not follow the right path, but everyone is still given the right to chances and opportunities to choose which path they would like to take, Keeping in mind that you cannot take both.

If you feel as though your born at a disadvantage in this life, it usually means one of 2 things, you did not learn from the mistakes in your past life or if you achieve the life your living now you will have past your lasts tests before entrance to 'heaven' or the next dimensional stage of existence. I believe all dimensions and realms are different, they have different purposes, organisms and overall life and I believe that life is a series of tests. 

In life, you have to utilise what you have been given or what you can create and make the most of it. Life is about navigating around to make the best decisions for yourself and thus creating the best existence. When you learn to transcend worldly desires, you learn that your body, mind and spirit is all you own. You learn that your body is just a beautiful custom-made spacesuit to keep you alive on this planet, it's a physical representation of who you are, but it is not you. Mentally you must master yourself, using your mental capacity to figure out who you are, where you are, how your body works and what you are destined to do here. Your mind also controls your emotions, by learning your mind properly you know your emotions. Nothing will be able to control you. 

Then there's the spiritual side of you. It's the real you, the part of you that you can only feel or hear but not see. Your spiritual side is what transcends this world that you live in, it knows everything about you, everything you think and feel and everything your going to do. Your soul is pure energy when you die it becomes lifeforce for another person and continues this cycle until you finally learn what you need to move up to the next stage.

This is why I say life is simple, we complicate life by showing no interest in ourselves. In our own infinite capacity, we don't believe in ourselves. So instead we seek from everything around us, which leads to confusion. We listen to teachers and doctors and scientist who have only been taught selective knowledge. True sage teachers are people who have mastered their mind, body and spirit. True sages understand the connection with everything around them, G-d created the earth and everything on it to teach us valuable lessons in life.

Life is simple, Don't make life complicated. Don't let bad experiences shape you, don't let good experiences encourage you to take life for granted. Enjoy this existence the best way you can and remember to stay humble. What's important is where you go when you die, not where you are now.

Thanks for reading!

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Starve The Ego, Feed The Soul

To often we act out of pride and lose the people we love because of our ego. Our ego is our fake sense of self-esteem and self importance. Purposefully there for everyone else to see. It is what we want people to think of us. Which is why I titled this post

'Starve the ego, feed the soul'

Your ego is not you. It's coating your low self-esteem and self worth, your hiding underneath it and not being who you truly are. You don't need ego to show high self worth because you actually become that. True winners are people that abandon their ego, don't read this senseless garbage in motivational books about ego being essential to be a winner, your competitive nature or desire to succeed has nothing to do with ego, it is embedded within you.

Don't be afraid to show emotion to show, to show that you love & care for someone. Ego will replace that emotion for pride, anger and rejection, scorn and picking holes in other people, as so to avoid yourself.

Ego leads to what I call 

Attack of the ball sacks or Battle of the nipples

I say this because of how endlessly pointless living in ego can become, especially because its not the real you.

Life is so short & so fast. The shoes you have on today may not fit you next year. What upsets you now will be a distant memory in the near future, why is it we create problems that don't really exist. Out of thin air we find problems in things around us, in others & ourselves instead of observing the moment and truly reflecting on what we really should be thinking about. 

Many people have ego for different reasons, usually it's to hide something you really don't want someone else to know. People say the nastiest things to protect there pride or protection from embarrassment. Not really meaning what they say & do. 

Face yourself & what your hiding from. Don't be ashamed to say that you have emotions and feelings towards a situation, feeling embarrassed or sad doesn't make you any less of a person it makes you brave for being a bigger & better person. For wanting to deeply move on from your past & what's blocking you to a better future. 

Apologise when necessary & don't live in regret, don't live in your ego. Your ego is a senseless version of you, who only cares about how people perceive you, you are bigger than your ego, overcoming your ego may sometimes feel like your losing your mind. It's not your mind, losing your ego is being the true you. 

Value things in life, feel express & be

Starve The Ego, Feed The Soul 

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Start Loving People For Who They Are

Love people for who they are and not what you them to be. Expectations lead to disappointments; the only person you can rely and expect anything from is yourself, being that you can handle it if you let yourself down.

This is the year to leave all your obstacles in the past, forgive yourself, forgive those who have done ill favored things against you, forgive those who did not believe in you, who we're not there for you. Forgive those who let you down, or didn't treat you the way you know you deserved. 

You are complete with, or without them, you don't need anything more then to wholeheartedly believe in yourself. This is how you can know yourself - to know others. Without a solid structure to teach people, growing up in this society can become confusing.

What is being a 'good person'?

You mean no harm to others so you automatically assume you have a good heart, you are a good person. But can you ever be be complete without truly loving other people? 

People you know, or people you don't know, harboring hate for anyone or anything is the same as harboring hatred for yourself. 

Life is about trying to achieve balance, there would be no such thing as  good without bad. A certain amount of bad, or darkness has to be present within you and everyone else for goodness and light to exist. You want to be disciplined in, 'innerstanding' that the same works for other people. Judge people the same way you would judge yourself. You acknowledge the things you don't like about them; you dislike those things, they are not good for you. But you can still love that person, knowing those things and knowing that, this is how they are or will be. Don't change them, or allow them to change you.

You don't hate a person, you hate the bad things that they do. You hate the darkness within them. Some people carry more darkness then light; so more bad then good, you love the good side and you hate the bad side. At some point you must acknowledge unless they are the definition of evil (which is unlikely) the bad side is not them. It is how they are dealing with their emotions and daily life, they do not know better, or do not currently care for better, but that is not your lesson to teach them.  

 SETTING THE STANDARD

Learn how much of something you can tolerate with out it disturbing your harmony. Look at them like a family member, some you are naturally closer to then others, some make you feel uneasy, some you don't really feel you have much in common with at all, its just the way it is. This will help you avoid bad relationships with anyone because you are objectively deciding what is good for you and how much of it your willing to deal with.

Acknowledge that no one wants to be hated everyone born into this existence wants and needs to be loved, every living thing needs love, it is simply how we are born and the nature of our existence. 

Start loving people for who they are and not what you want them to be

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How To Control Your Emotions

Ever wonder why you're sometimes your just upset or confused for no reason?

Ever done something that seemed like a good idea at the time and turned out to be one of the worst decisions you've ever made?

You can control your emotions by observing them. Observing your emotions will change your life.

GET BACK TO BASICS

Your emotions are free-flowing energy within you. We are always feeling emotions at all times. Emotions and how we categorise them are just words we use, so that other people understand how we feel. Although how you truly feel can never be put in words. You can never really describe your deepest emotions, you just try to make sense of them the best you can. 

Life is simple. There are, no complicated methods, to being you. It's just your emotions; the influence it has on all your actions, emotions influence everything you think and feel whether you realise it or not. The fact is when you're in a bad mood you react badly to things around you. You loose control of yourself, these are not things that are helping you for the better but instead for the worst.

When you observe your emotions you really are observing how you feel. You're observing how certain things are making you feel, in knowing that the way something makes you feel will influence your actions.

Everything you attract in your life is based on your energy. Every action you take is based on how you feel, the way you express yourself, the way you carry yourself, the way you do things. Are all based on how you feel. 

So are your emotions controlling you? Or are you controlling your emotions?

Your emotions are so powerful, they are infinite energy. You never run out of emotions, you never loose steam and forget them. Even those who claim to have the coldest hearts still have feelings and emotions. Your better off not pretending they exist because they do. They influence your life every day.

OBSERVE YOUR EMOTIONS

For example;

When someone asks you a question you reply.

When someone asks you a question when you're angry, you shout

When someone asks you a question when your crying, your overwhelmed and don't want to answer

When someone asks you a question and your excited, you answer in delight

You are the greatest version of yourself when you are, observing yourself. You are not who you think you are. You are the infinite life force inside of you. That keeps you conscious, happy and healthy every day. You are in a space suit walking around life observing everything around you, nothing around you has any value apart from the value you have already applied it. You are not your experiences but you think you are because they trigger feelings and how you feel about these memories. You are not anything that you see around you. You have not yet seen your true self, only the outer shell given for you to survive on this planet.

Imagine your emotions like a flowing river of energy, you cannot stop the river. Even if you build a dam it only slows down the momentum of the river. Yet if you flow with the river, where ever it goes you will eventually reach its end and you will already know it's source. The source of your emotions points out how you feel, not how you act.

Flow with your emotions and ask yourself, why do I feel like this? Where are these emotions coming from?

Do not act on your emotions instead, consider it's source and choose the way it will end. You can only fix a problem when you are aware that you are experiencing it. 

Place no value on your emotions, instead place value on why you are feeling them and this is where your answers will be found. Remember no matter what it is that anyone in this world says or does to you. It is how you feel about it that makes it true. It is how you feel about it that makes it real. The only truth that exists is within you and the power of your feelings and emotions.

I reached this breakthrough through reading this article 'Removing Suffering From Pain With Meditation'.

Jaja Wallace also known as @spiritelixir on twitter is the creator and author of a spiritual community called KindFeelings. He writes on kindness, love, truth and staying focused on your life path despite many distractions in this modern day and age. Be sure to check him out!

Thanks For Reading!

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How To Deal With Lies And Deceit

Leave it in g-ds capable hands, to deal with those who have committed defamation against you
Leave it in g-ds capable hands, to deal with those who have distorted the truth

Leave it in g-ds capable hands, to deal with those that have made to watch you suffer

Leave it in g-ds capable hands those that have meant harm and evil against you

Leave it in g-ds capable hands to deal with those who have sinned against you

Definition: Deceit

The action or practice of deceiving someone by concealing or misrepresenting the truth.

Definition: Lie

To give an intentionally false statement.

The longer the karma takes, the worse it will be. I have chosen my battles wisely; I have watched and waited, I have analysed and observed and most importantly I have been sure not to interfere with workings of the universe. Knowing that everything I am suffering is for good reason. Your energy is currency and weaker spirits will drain you of yours to refill their cup. Weak, depleted souls will actively search for worthy candidates to drain. 

Nevertheless, these are the warning signs. It's good to have a standard rule for everyone who comes and goes in life. I believe that energy is currency. It is the only true currency we have here on earth, when your energy is depleted you can no longer do anything or give anymore. I read somewhere that a life of lies and deceit is only an attack to you depending on how to choose to react to it. Deceit against you does not have to be about you depending our your actions towards it, you can take the viewpoint that the wrongdoer actually betrayed themselves, by betraying their own integrity. But ideally, this would depend on how strongly you believe in integrity and how important it is to you in your life. Which it should be if this person has deceived you in a way you would never do to them in return. 

HOW TO DEAL WITH IT

We must protect our energy, I have very strong and potent energy, I generate high energy from my emotions as we all do. My flat rule is that I only give what I get, I am very weary of other people, I take the time to listen and watch people before I interact with them, I feel the aura and the energy behind the words they say. I only give whatever I get, if I get 20% from you then you get exactly the same back if I get 60% its the same vice versa.

DISCERNMENT

Definition: Discernment The ability to judge well.

Knowing how to decide and make the right decisions is important. Its largely based on how a person makes you feel. If you immediately feel uncomfortable you know that something is wrong, if you feel nervous or scared you know something is not right, if you feel happy and safe then naturally you loosen up.Be on your guard, you must watch what people say and do when you are not around, you must truly listen to their words even in jest.

CONSTANT AWARENESS

Controlling and observing your own emotions is an essential part of doing this, you cannot properly feel the energy of others if you are easily offended or unconscious of how certain energies make you react. Some people are naturally more sensitive to energy than others, you must work on yourself and be in balance, to be able to properly tell when someone else is out of balance.

Keep in mind that no one is perfect. Most people are imbalanced but they still mean well, we are all flawed. Being able to sit back and observe that without any feelings towards it is an achievement in itself.

Above all don't act on lies and deceit, don't let lies and deceit cripple you. Protect your loving heart and behave accordingly. Those that harmed you, risk losing you. They have betrayed themselves and their own core values. This alone is like punishment. For that reason alone it is and will always be their loss and not yours. You only add value to the lives of  the people you encounter, you are pure and eternal potential all bundled into one body. 
Carry on with your life, heal your wounds, show the world how you've blossomed and flourished, remember the truth will always prevail and the guilty will be made to eat their words in the future.

Thank me later

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